Choice

its the choices a person makes in his/her

lifetime that gives the person his/her

identity. Some choices are made

for reasons we believe to be logical;

some are based on false hopes

and dreams of the past once again repeating.

"Lovers always come

and lovers always go

and no one really knows who's letting go today."

-November Rain, Guns 'N Roses

some choices are made because

some people refuse to step out of their

comfort zone even if its killing them not to.

so afraid of what will happen next,

when they leave their miserable zone,

they do not know what to expect.

it happens to scare them to know

that they would want to leave the

fears that they have lived with for

so long and face new things

which might bring about other fears.

i would like to add that i,

would encourage people to choose

what they really want and not what

they THINK they want

Desire

Lifting off, the dream was just a dream

which might become reality,

before it does, it has a minimal effect

to do with my life or the way it's lived.

In one's life first comes dreams;

then comes wants and needs.

Want, the most basic form of desire.

Isn't it true that to anyone out there,

with enough desire, a want becomes a need?

Then wouldn't it be that

the line between wants and needs

cannot be drawn clearly by another party?

It is through our desire to live

that humans compete with nature to create

a convenient environment by

lording over the rest of nature

with our brute ways

in order to ensure our interests and survival.

(Survival of the fittest)

When food and water is considered to be

needs of sustaining our lives,

our desire to live brings us to feel

a need to nourish ourselves.

so if even the most basic

survival is driven by desire,

then shouldn't life be all about desires

instead of just fulfilling our needs?

Why so are we taught to

WORK to fuel our needs

and confine ourselves in our own

prison of sick and schedule routines

which do not fully benefit us but

thoroughly benefit others?

For one, when most people work,

they earn money for the company,

for the owners to achieve their desires.

While they slog for loose change,

the higher-ups reap the profits.

The world is fair,

some people just fair better than others.

Now what's your desire,

to simply live because you're alive

or to live for your desires?

decide.

The Dream

Good morning.
It's 4am and since I'm really bored,
I've decided to tell more about myself.

At this time of the night,
needless to say, most of us are dreaming
whether we will remember these dreams,
it's entirely a different matter.

The entiire story starts of -as far
as I can remember- in the year 2000,
7 years ago, my 13th year of life.
As a child of that age, I was
obsessed with money and definitely,
ladies. However, I never could figure
out up to recently, why every girl
I have dated up till even today
has been for all but emotional salvation.

Until I dreamt of her again,
I should mention that I cannot
remember most of my
dream-land adventures.
However, my mind has not permitted
that I forgot dreams with this one
important person.

Thursday, 6th May 2010.
2 days ago, I once again saw this
exact same person.
It is perhaps an understatement
to say that I do not support
relationships. Despite my
disapproval, in every dream
with her, we are in a relatiionship.
I began to realise that maybe,
just maybe, my whole ideal
image of a woman is projected
in this girl.

It puzzles even me as to
how this image came about,
but I never am able to remember
her face. All that I know is that
she bears no resemblance to
anyone I've ever seen or met.
She seemed almost celstial to me,
everytime I see her,
my mood soars to altitudes I cannot
begin to describe.

The prelude is over
and the story has only begun.
Unfortunately, I'm beginning
to feel like I might have
accidently written too much.

As to when I would percive
the next post to be written.
that's for me to know...

"I loved her simply because I found her irresistible.
I knew my sorrow, often and often, if not always, that I loved her against reason, against promise, against peace, against hope, against happiness, against all discouragement that could be. Once for all; I loved her none the less because I knew it, and it had no more influence in restraining me, than if I had devoutly believed her to be human perfection."

Can you tell?
Too shy to speak,
too cold to hold,
with sleeves too short to wear our hearts on,
we sit around, stoned in silence
and steal stares at each other
and scrunch our faces asking "what?"
which is always met with a "nothing"
with a smile.

"What?"
"Nothing."

Is Religion a Lie?

"Do Miracles take away Freewill?"

A video i happened to chance upon
on youtube by a user called "FightingAtheist"

i happen to agree with this user.
however i hope the audience would understand
that these words although insensitive
should be taken into consideration,
as students we should broaden our minds.

"What is freewill? The American Heritage dictionary defines freewill as: Done of one's own accord or voluntary. Freewill basically means you have a choice.
What is a Miracle? The American Heritage dictionary defines a miracle as: An event that appears inexplicable by the laws of nature and so is held to be supernatural in origin or an act of God.
Do miracles take away freewill? If you were to see someone turn water into wine, would you believe they had magical powers? Would you have a choice? Does just seeing the act take away your freewill to choose what you believe? If a man showed you holes in his hands, and claimed he was crucified, does this automatically make you a believer, or can you still choose not to believe he was crucified? You still have the ability to ask questions and search for more evidence.
The obvious answer is that miracles do not take away freewill. We are able to continue making choices unless someone or something takes away our freewill. Losing freewill could be done by some sort of mind control, or physical force.
If a god appeared to the world and performed miracles that every person could see, and told everyone to bow down and worship him, everyone would still have freewill and the ability to say no. The miracles do not take away freewill. They are simply evidence of the power of that god or of some deception. For our freewill to be taken, the god would have to use some sort of mind control that would cause people to lose the ability to choose, or force us physically to bow down.
An argument could be made that seeing the god is taking away our freewill to believe in its existence. This argument makes a little sense but, seeing the god does not take away the choice between worshiping the god, and disregarding it. We could still make decisions, based on freewill as to whether or not we think the god is good, evil, or fake. We could still choose not to worship it.

A common argument used by religious people is "God can not appear before us. If he did, that would take away our freewill to believe in him." But belief in a god does not make you one of his sheep. It is obedience to that god, following its commands, and worshiping that god. Belief that the god exist does not automatically make you a part of the special "in crowd" nor does it get you a place in paradise, 72 virgins, reincarnation, or whatever superstitious afterlife that god promises.

So why would a god, that supposedly loves everyone, not appear to us and show some undeniable miracles to help people convert? We know that his appearance and miracles would not take away freewill. We would still be free to not worship. A loving god would do whatever he could to save his children from hell, even if it included appearing and showing miracles daily.

Believing in a god based on no evidence and then claiming the lack of evidence is because more evidence would take away freewill is simply not true. No evidence exists because there is no god and no hell. Take peace in knowing you don't have to live your life with the false hope of heaven and the fear of hell. "

So much time left for regret.

Does it ever occur to anyone,
that somehow we all have our own skeletons
and all it takes is that when something dies
bury it all up and celebrate its life.

if im gonna get to personal feelings,
which might be the first of which ive revealed
im absolutely shaking in fear right now,
for the people around me, for myself.

what confuses me the most is how
everytime something happens,
it gets pulled into a whole chain reaction,
like raining is not enough,
there must be typhoons.

regretting is inevitable,
facing mistakes, whether drugged,
intoxicated, or rash,
anything that constitutes to bad decisions.
will definately be a bitch.
what defines a person's character
is the ability or inability
to right the wrongs.

we as humans possess an ability
a capacity to think, filter and
make choices entirely out of free will.
it is inate, and simple, that everyone
can decide things for themselves,
so what makes a human drive
him/herself to desolation and suicide.

although it might be true that
one cannot live without embracing
suicide or crime. however,
it does not justify the need to
truely carry the act out,
that's what our vessels of
grey matter are for.

alcohol and/or drugs fogs up the mind,
the only reason one will consider
actually carrying out these insane
thoughts. i beseech anyone to never
never ever allow themselves a
chance to die.
any human no matter how discontented
should always remember what they
deeply desire. "i should want to live"

suicide,
if anything, it causes everyone around
who cares to break apart,
as long as a single person in any
closed group departs this godforsaken
world, the whole group will be dealt a
heavy blow, that causes the bonds formed
between them to be severly damaged.

nobody has to say goodbye prematurely
and nobody has the right to.
no matter how deep rooted your regrets are.
we all have to face some shit now or than,
but in the end, lift your head up,
tuck in your stomach and
strut like the warrior we all are.

we should live

Quote.

you know, being of this age. we often argue with our parents. but then sometimes, if we don't say what we want to say, im afraid, one day it'll be too late to admit we don't see eye to eye

"Crumpled bits of paper
Filled with imperfect thought
Stilted conversations
I'm afraid that's all we've got

You say you just don't see it
He says it's perfect sense
You just can't get agreement
In this present tense
We all talk a different language
Talking in defense

Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
It's too late when we die
To admit we don't see eye to eye

So we open up a quarrel
Between the present and the past
We only sacrifice the future
It's the bitterness that lasts

So Don't yield to the fortunes
You sometimes see as fate
It may have a new perspective
On a different day
And if you don't give up, and don't give in
You may just be O.K."

- Mike + the Mechanics

Plain, simple and forgotten

It is a pretty irrevocable fact that
everyone has their own secrets.
That truthful figure of ourselves
as humans of virtue we painted
is nothing more than a beautiful
lie we created to give us
that comfort that we so long for
in truth. Where we would be
able to bask in the light.

Unfortunately, the hypocrite
that we as humans have the
capacity to cultivate in ourselves
forces us to do some - things -
the most basic is to put on
a new mask, the mask that which
abolishes all the responsibility to
explain our actions even to ourselves.

for example, when a
person does something against his
desires for the pleasure or
acceptance of another, he
would then automatically
explain it as an act of loyalty.
but he forgets to be loyal
to his heart.

slowly, inch by inch,
seconds over seconds,
this person will begin to lose
himself in all his own web of lies
but for how long?
a web is made by thin
connecting lines and all it takes
is just some gale and it might
all end up all gone with the wind.

a person may be able to live in
this web for days, weeks, months
or even years before it starts
to tear apart.
while it might be true that he can
try to patch it up or add more layers
but it is but only a matter of time.
before a wind that will be much too
powerful comes along and disintegrates
the entire web, leaving him
to question his own truth again.

When the person finally figures
that he has forgotten himself
and simply cannot turn back time
he knows he has to move on.
but yet, he has lost too many things.
and most importantly, he has lost
the last 4 years.

will he continue to live in this
artificial happiness he made for himself
to think that he is satisfied as long as
he knows, that one person he
wanted acceptance from
is contented with his results and
the meaningless fruits of labour
he would painfully and dutifully
reap. or will he leave?

will i live this lie?

"and above all else, be truthful to thine ownself"

Stupidity

when for the whole of my sad existence
i've been trying to be "myself"
i took so long to stop and notice:
staring at me, the self has became
a reflection of other's expectations.
what's the worst part of it all is that
this is an incomplete reflection,
i have failed to live in the dreams
that others wanted to live..
i have failed my mom.

the stupid thing is that,
parents always force their kids to
finish their unfinished dreams,
claiming it's "for the kids' good"..
what the hell is that?
some lousy excuse....

now many parents wonder why
their kids lie to them?
if they ever want to blame anyone,
blame the media,
blame education, blame superiors
or whatever, that we have started
formulating our own ideals
and to destroy the hopes of these
is akin to tearing up our hearts.
much like the effects of our disobediance
to them.

yes. I BLAME SOCIETY
I BLAME EDUCATION
and the sole purpose of its existance,
IDUSTRIALISATION
and its fucking growing demands..
we are bred and born to learn, my ass.
its the rich and powerful
who needed workers...
that's the reason why educational
institutions came about..
and the few people who
manage to break out of the
cycle of poverty,
its not thanks to education
its thanks to 'heart',
the passion to stop conforming..
that's how they "made it"....
not by studying. shitheads



*sorry. this is just my opinion.

It's time for men to speak.

First of all, I'd like people to stop wondering
why the hell the title is '...for men...' instead of
'...for women...' the answer is simple, just read on.
I'm pretty confident that some people out there
already know why but are too lazy to speak up.

I understand that i might have already written
something about this topic; about how women
should stop whining and begging for equality
like their pathetic lives hold nothing
more to be squabbling with men about.

BUT

I do happen to have more to say.
Women who have so sold themselves to the
theories of feminism are clueless.
Women who sell ideas of feminism are
oblivious to the differences between men and women
and are most likely to be smelly, smoking, alcoholic
and as maddox says, they have "unshaven armpits."
Well, they arent so bad, they just need education.

Let me add that feminism, is a ----ing LIE.
If you need to know, there is no such thing as
chauvinism either. Also, "Lesbian" is a term
created by incoherent women who know
nothing about themselves nor men in fact, all of the
above mentioned terms are invented by them.

I'm sick of all these bullshit.
Women keep complaining about how they are treated.
What about guys? Now, women know about their
stupid wrong "rights" and are abusing it.
While guys who so love their women are losing
every single bit of their pride to let women have their ways!
It's time for men to speak! My fellow civillised people,
let me reach out to you. Think back and look through
history, do men really owe women that much?

Back when women were not educated,
families stuck together due to dependence.
But no, we had to change that, alright.
We did so with not much complaints,
and they were educated and given a chance.
Fastforward till today, ignoring everything else
that men have been trying to compromise,
women are still complaining, going
on and on about non-existant discrimination
on the fairer sex! Now, thanks to the
endless complaints, the recession has
affectted guys much worse than girls.
If you dumb whores still think it's due
to your efforts, let me tell you this,
for a fact, it is because you keep complaining!
and the bosses don't want to have to
deal with your unfounded accusations,
not one or two but
hundreds of them...
if you dont get what you want,
you keep going at it dont you?

now don't me wrong. that's not the end.
i have enough to fill up a book with
but i'll stop for today and you can reflect on it.
im sorry if this affects anyone badly.
Its just my thoughts, my opinion.
but i still think. girls, you might
take this as a differing set of thoughts
and try to reconsider ever listening to feminists

Man

it was said "All the world's a stage;
and all men and women, merely players"
and if it were true, then every part of our
very meaningless lives are just filled
with bits and pieces of our different faces.

that then brings us to hypocrisy.
how many of us truly mean what we say?
Humans can never be the same,
we all change, to fit into the situation
that's survival instinct.
and should we accidently bump
into situations that actually require sacrifice,
most of the time, it isn't gonna be oneself
that will be put on the sacrificial alter.

we're going through, in my opinion,
phases, different acts and scenes hold different
details and characters.
and thus, we react differently.
but it never is truely what we want to say.
is it?

then, i was recently told
"you can never expect things to bend your way"
i took the liberty to behave as i always thought i should
i rebutted quite impulsively.
"then one day it will."

think about it, im non-conformist.
i never believed in rules that cannot bend.
of course i must admit, i have to pay the price.
when it comes down to the real deal,
there're too many people who just conform,
to me, weaklings, who don't like what they're in for
but will follow suit just to get past life.

is that what people are?
the only person who's true to himself/herself
is the person who set the rules.
i'm not going to set my life to meaningless
rules and regulations. no, not me.
and im urging people to join me in my ideals
to once again listen to themselves.
and do what they think is right.

if we keep sticking to orders,
we stick to routines. and yes.
the analogy of
"the van named routine"
it might be comfortable;
you're never going to be ahead.
think for yourself and decide.
if you're even on this blog,
then something has brought you here.

aim to succeed, not to survive.
for we only have this one life,
don't live in the shadows of others
and end up dying like you've never lived

Examinations

Well, recently, -or for a very long time-
i havent been updating. Because i was too busy.
this may sound like an excuse but i had much
more important things than to fill up space on this blog.

anyways, i got to go. well, to people who actually read
this blog, i promise to update once exams are over
and throughout the hols~! thank you~

BPC

In the Singapore Statutes,
Under "Children & Young Persons Act",
Chapter 38, Section 50,
power of parent or guardian to bring
child or young person before juvenille court
it states that,
[ (1) Where the parent or guardian of a child or young person proves to a Juvenile Court that he is unable to control the child or young person, the Court, if satisfied —
(a) that it is expedient so to deal with the child or young person; and
(b) that the parent or guardian understands the results which will follow from, and consents to, the making of the order,

may order the child or young person —
(i) to be placed on supervision under the supervision of an approved welfare officer or of some other person appointed for the purpose by the Court for a period not exceeding 3 years; or
(ii) to be sent to an approved home for a period of not less than 2 years and not more than 3 years.
[20/2001]

(2) The provisions of section 49 (5), (6) and (7) shall apply, with the necessary modifications, in respect of an order made by the Juvenile Court under subsection (1) as they apply in respect of an order made by the Juvenile Court under section 49 (1).
[20/2001]

(3) The Juvenile Court may, on the application of the Director, a protector or the parent or guardian of any child or young person in respect of whom an order under subsection (1) has been made, vary or discharge the order if the Court is satisfied that it is in the best interests of the child or young person to do so. ]-http://statutes.agc.gov.sg/non_version/html/homepage.html

Now, this whole chunk of information,
may give you deeper understanding on
the subject of 'beyond parental control'

but, who's to decide whether the child
had intentions to go against his parents
or whether the child knew of what was
the consequences that he had to face
besides the common nagging, grounding, etc.

recently, an article was published,
on the 19th of march, 2008,
on the New Paper,
sensationalising the common use of
this particular law, albiet too common perhaps,
saying that the youngest victim of such
reckless use of the nation's legislation
was only 7 great years of age.

his crime; not liking school and refusing
to go to school. now, tell me, how many
of us like it on the first year of primary school?
look at the vast amounts of little faces tearing
on the first day of school and tell me that they
love the school to bits on their first entry to school.
if you can do that, perhaps you had better recieve
a slap on your face. think about your own experience.

if the judgement of him, being beyond control is
left to the decision of the mother, then can i just
say, that parents growing awareness of such
a law is leading to the abuse of the legislation.
there is no law that leaves the child a chance to speak,
even if the childrens' society tries to resolve
parent-child conflicts, the child may not know
how to react and end up appearing rebellious,
leading to settlement in the Juvenille Court.

this section of the Singapore Statutes, should be
repealled or maybe changed to remind parents
that perhaps, the best way to bring their children
up is to take responsibility.

nowadays, parent might lack time to communicate
with their kids, leading to misunderstandings,
and without trying to sound their child out,
they resort to taking refuge in Law,
are parents really making the right choice
by giving up chances to bond with their child
and shaping the child's character?
if a child can so easily become incorrigible in the
eyes of the parents, are the parents really placing
in enough efforts? or are they just seeking
an easier way out than to take sole onus of their
child's behaviour?

Is the government really helping family conditions
by allowing parents to use BPC as a threat or worse,
as a way to push the responsibilities of raising and
morally educating ther children to the government?

i stand for this vague and overused
legislation to be repealled or at least changed
to question the parents' own efforts in trying to
reach their kids instead of questioning the kids
in their ability to conform to orders of their parents
kids have picked up the individualistic mindset
of the current society and it is up to the parents,
not the government to find a way to get them
to listen to their parents.

Freedom

everybody wants freedom right?
but nobody truely values freedom
like they always say,
freedom is valued only when you
fight for it.

free of control, students become delinquents
free of financial woes, the rich never save
free of burden, the people get lazy

when will humans learn to stop enslaving
themselves by countless amount of fear?
to be truely free, we must free ourselves.

this freedom, can never be attained by force
we cannot fight for this.
unless of course, you describe it as fighting
against yourself.
many days in our lives, we find ourselves
not knowing what to do.
yet when given something to do, we will
complain about the workload,
we are never satisfied with freedom
nor were we satisfied with commitments

yet sometimes, people seem to look down
upon us when we try our best to fit in.
we conform to people's expectations of us
just to have friends
but then, we forget ourselves.

we are enslaved by the desire for company,
companionship. so what if we were alone?
if we can hold our heads high, we are free
from the social norm and lies that we
made ourselves to be, to conform is not exactly
a smart choice because one day, you'd fall,
fall into depression with both legs in the abyss
instead of the usual one leg in the abyss and
the other in dreams

Fear

our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate
our deepest fear is that we're powerful beyond measure
it's our light, not out darkness that frightens us the most
your playing small does not serve the world
there's nothing enlightened about shinking
so other people won't feel insecure about you
we are all meant to shine as children do
it's not just in some of us; it's in everyone
and as we let our own light shine
we unconciously give other people
permission to do the same
as we are liberated from our own fear
our presence automatically liberates others
-Timo Cruz, Coach Carter(2005)

Fear is omnipresent, perhaps, even closer
to us than God.
it may even be the reason why we pray.
when we know that all of us are good at somthing
or are outstanding in a certain way, we try hard
to avoid showing off our abilities. the reason being
we dont want to be labelled show offs, we dont want
to stand out or many other reasons.

we want to seem as 'normal' as possible.
so that we have a group of friends just like us,
always around us, thinking that we're just like
them -'normal'- nothing out of the ordinary.

we try so hard that there and then, we become lost
we lose whatever talents or personality we have had,
we get absorbed into the social norm and become
deindividualised, we think of our limits as equal,
equal with others and that we can never achieve
incredible feats.

like Timo Cruz in Coach Carter said,
nothing is gained from blending in, to really make
a difference, free yourself of fear,
when you're racing, don't watch your speedometer,
when you're swimming, be one with the fish,
when you're running, look ahead not the ground.
when you're dancing, close your eyes and ignore everyone
that's when you are your best.

and when people around you start to see your brilliance,
they will believe more and more in themselves,
who doesnt want to make a difference,
who wants to die as though they never lived?
take the first step and ignore your fears.

everyone can make a difference.
stop believing in the social norm
start believing in yourself. shine with brilliance

Debates

people nowadays have to force
me to do this.
why do girls think that if it's not right,
it's wrong.
nope it's not only a few girls,
it's most girls. i swear..

my mom goes "not you wrong then me la!"
what the fuck? i'm trying to tell you why
the hell i cannot go home straight after
school? or perhaps why the hell i get to
go out on saturdays? or perhaps why
the fuck you shouldn't search my bag?

damn it, i'm not trying to find fault with
anyone or place a fault anywhere.
i'm just trying to justify my views.
there is a god damned difference.
a debate is always about an issue in which
people can never find a solid answer for
it's questions like "can a mom search her
kid's bag?"

if you say yes, then i'd say what about
the kid's privacy and feelings when he
finds his mom can't trust him?

OR

if you said no, then i'd ask what about
the mom? won't she want to know her
kid well enough when the kid won't open
up to her?

see, either way, no one's wrong. idiots.
when i debate with girls over issues,
they happen to think i think i'm right.
god fuck you. whoever said i'm right.
when you guys say "ya ya, you win"
you know how stupid it sounds?
i agree only to piss you off. shit.
i get pissed too when you keep saying
i'm right. cause i don't want to be right

it sounds dumb to say that, but you
just don't get the picture. it isn't
right or wrong.

this is not your science homework,
there are no such things as set answers
this is life. that's why we have our arts,
and that's why your history, geog, lit,
and so-on are subjective. cause there
isn't a right or wrong! almost every
civilisation hates Hitler. but the
germans love him.

are you going to tell the germans they
are wrong cause they love him?
there was a side he shows the germans
that we didnt get to see.
he was nervous on stage and his palms
sweat, like a child at a talent time holding
the mic and on stage for the 1st time.
it's not wrong that they respected him.

under him, they prospered. what's the
rest of the world trying to do?
we are trying to prosper too. he managed
to bring prosperity to his people. but
he brought suffering to the jews.
that doesn't mean he was entirely wrong.
he did give the germans a good life.
but the genocide part was off limits.
so was he right? no, but he wasn't wrong.

there, get it? or do i need to further
elaborate that not everything in this world
has a right and wrong?
all debates are meant for are to justify your
views, instead of trying to find right faults,
maybe you should try making your points
sound more reasonable.

if i come of strong at my arguements and
that makes you feel belittled and unrespected
so much so it hurts your SELF-esteem,
please remember it's SELF-esteem, it's
how you look at yourself.

or

if i sound like i'm trying to say i'm right and
everyone else is wrong, please record our
conversations and check at which point
i say "you're wrong and i'm right" unless it
was already a written fact and i had it backed.

open your mind and be level headed.
stop thinking that everything is a set piece
we're not playing true or false, we're going
through life as humans and there isn't a
right or wrong

god damned i got loads of free time

maybe too much. so much that

i spend too much of it drinking life away

and everytime i get high and my friends

go for a smoke, i suddenly feel like i need

to see someone. who? i'm not able to tell

Perfection

tell me people, how often do we
wish so much to be perfect without
realising the subtle yet catastrophic
effects of perfection.

i sure am guilty of such sinful desires
of perfection.

but i had an epiphany, i came upon
the understanding that perfection
isn't really wonderful. it is but
a barrier.

if a being is perfect, it would therefore
mean that nothing is better.
not even himself, he cannot improve,
he cannot become better,
simply because he is already perfect.

to say that something is perfect would
mean that it will always stay that way.
don't we all see that in order for society
to run, we need to keep improving?

we need to set our sights higher than
the current 'best' and that would mean
that nobody is perfect or will be.
so give up your dreams of perfection
and set your sights to growth and
evolution. be far more ambitious
and live for the moment.

Fables

Every fable has it's morals.
but we all so readily duck them.

we only love the thrill of an
adventure but hate moral lessons

there. animal farm is written in
with the masterful mechanics
of George Orwell who makes
it look as though he was only
personifying animals.
but he was actually writing about
humans.

in the Bard's play, there often are
jesters, wise men whom say
things that seem to make no sense
[or so you thought]
but they are actually relaying the
morals of the story across to us
or the characters in the play.

they are fabulists and are never
popular. the fabulist in Hamlet,
the fool, disappeared and in other
plays, they either got beheaded
or recieved punishment
for telling people in authority
what they need to know but
didn't enjoy knowing.
see, they are never popular.

"being a fabulist is a thankless
job"-William Golding, Lord
of the Flies

then, we need fabulists,
just like haters, can you imagine a
world without haters?
there will be nobody to keep
complaining to governments
about how much their policy sucks,
nobody to notice certain facts
missed out.
you need haters

and you need morals

The final word, truth

what's lost and what's gained?
nothing.

this was one hell of a year,
but it only made the world seem colder.
if somebody thinks it's really easy
to keep this kinda life,
that must be goddarned rich or
simply ignorant.

just barely past a month and
there goes $2000, try it.
if everything seems like there's
hope in it, im sorry, you're wrong

it's what you chose to believe in.
personally, i don't really believe in
happiness anymore.

im on a joyride of death and i don't
wish to take anyone with me.
i just can't do it.

can't believe that people think
i'm leading a kind of carefree life,
everyday, i worry about how things
may turn out. and it's always
far from positive.

when all the negetive thoughts
come at you like an opprobrious
father, where do you have to run?

i take it all in, like a vacuum;
you have to suck up
all the shit and dead cockroaches
but all people do is leave you
in a corner till they find more shit
and they kick you around
cause you are an obstruction.

yeah. that's life.

try to picture that.

Genesis

where do all these come from?

when you start to realise that
everything you've probably stood for
starts to fall apart, can you stop it?

the future was never written in stone,
or was it?

come to think about it, you've always
wanted to be a free man,
and a free man always have choices.

you may have wanted to avoid certain
things. but your destiny seems to say
otherwise. what's destiny?

when you say you have no choice,
is it real? you always have choices,
even when at gunpoint,
you can say, "shoot me"
but you chose to follow orders.

your destiny is not decided,
people can always change the course
of events, people can always decide.

but then, most of us screw up anyway.

(thick brown wrappings of tobacco leaves,
a glass surrounded by warm water filled
with crystal clear brown liquid - enjoyment, not?)

"i'm standing on the edge of time

i walked away when love was mine

caught up in a world of uphill climbing

the tears are in my mind

and nothing is rhyming, oh mandy.

well you came and you gave without taking

but i sent you away, oh mandy"